Thursday, September 8, 2011

I don't feel like myself lately. I've been removed from everything that I believe, creates me. And I don't have any true time to sit around and restart myself, you know work on myself to get myself back in shape. I've been looking forward to 'change' for the longest, just made a huge life change & now I feel like more problems face me. It's not like I'm lazy, nor am I... dull. I am seriously just out of wack, it's like I need to take my body to the shop & get an alignment. I believe it's my environment, I feel like it's literally draining the soul out of me. I've moved into a different career but I'm still doing the same job. And I am making more money, but I truly realize the lyric from the infamous BIG - "Mo Money, Mo Problems". Damn. I have a plan but I'm pretty much winging it. I need to get it all together, but no matter how many times I jot it down, write it out, spread it out on excel - nothing is making sense anymore. I feel lost and confused. It could be a funk, but it could be more than that, could be [deeper] than that. Y'know? All I can do is pray that possibly, things get better. But who am I talking to when I send out these words? There's an emptiness inside of me. And I just want it to be filled up to the rim. Or at least halfway. Salaam,

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