Some months ago, before anything happened this summer - Oatz sent me this quote that remains locked in my phone. "Love takes off masks we fear we canNOT live w|OUT && know we canNOT live w|IN." -- often I've applied this to various situations in my life. Situations w| past relationships, situations where I throw it in there for good convo, situations for advice for|to friends. I've used it over && over; never once applying it to myself. My passions, Mr. Wilde are not a mere quotation.--
Yet I wonder about this quote now. My summer is definitely shutDOWN; && with what's been going on lately in my life -- the quote echoes a relevance in my membrane tapping my eardrum with questions;
What (the fcuk] is up with my mask?
L_ve removes our masks w|OUT notification|warning. There's no disclaimer. It's more like a smile, a finding of a common thought frame - blasphemous accusations. There's a comfortableness in the unease l_ve puts you in. ; I h_te l_ve. I h_te l_ve because one doesNOT have to do anything extra|ordinary in order to wiggle themselves into your captivity of being. Moving into all of your thoughts & making a home inside your chest. A heart beat who's rhythm no longer vibes from your step; but l_ve`s voice. And before you know it you're humming a different melody. Swept up in the honey moon stages of passions coasting on a fresh new air wave.
Yeah that's l_ve. And you don't even realize you've been pickpocket`d. You've been robbed of your mask & now you're vulnerable & the only thing to put you in a feeling of security|safeNET - is this thief.
(Now; aint that some bullshit?]
L_ve steals. It takes all of you & shares it w| someone new. Someone who you hope|wish & never even think will be like the last. They can't be.
"Say you gotta take the good & the bad, the happy & the sad. But when you bring a better future than I had in the past; `Cause I don't wanna make the same mistakes I did - I don`t wanna fall back on my face again."
I'm stepping back, fighting the force of this undefined|inFAMOUS law of nature whose fields are pulling me flat on my face. -- "Go ahead, I`ll always catch you." I'm not sure, though broken promises are better than none at all right. My safeNET is in your embrace. You are my spotter as life throws me in the air.--
Yes, I know that I have to come back down. I just want to keep my mask on straight when I hit; so you won't see me at rockBOTTOM.
THIS IS SOMETHING I WROTE WHILE ON THE F`TRAIN GOING TO FRKN 42ND STREET TO CATCH THE 7. STUFF JUSS POPS IN MY HEAD & WHEN IT DOES -- I ROLL WITH IT. THAT`S WHY I ALWAYS KEEP MY PHONE IN MY HAND.